.50 Caliber Terror

Delving right into things, let’s talk about the evil .50 BMG weapon. The NRA and their bigoted cohorts known as the Gun Lobby Gun Bloggers (hereafter referred to as “Gun Blobbers”) make excuses for the existence of such a weapon. They claim that, technically, more powerful rifles can be made and, in fact, have been made. They also claim that it is incredibly unlikely that a jet airliner could suffer enough damage to bring it down, or that a terrorist likely won’t even hit the target. They further question how we can be sure a terrorist would even target a jetliner with a rifle of such limited power.

Here is our answer:

Because we say so.

Let’s look at some facts. A .50 BMG round can:

• Crack an engine block.
• Crack the engine of a plane and, absolutely positively, kill everyone on board easily.
• Kill Superman.

Yes, the Man of Steel can be easily killed by this bullet. The .50 BMG round can penetrate over one inch of steel. Superman’s skin is only the equivalent of half-an-inch of steel armor. Lex Luthor is sure to buy this weapon, kill Superman, then shoot down a hundred airliners, including Air Force One. With Superman dead, they’ll be no one available to save those airliners from crashing. Our most vital component of aviation safety will have been disabled.

Ronnie Barrett must therefore be barred from making these firearms ever again.